Anything you lose automatically doubles in value.
Mignon McLaughlin

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
Will Rogers

When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time.
Author Unknown

Never do anything that you wouldn’t want to explain to the paramedics.
Author Unknown

Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
Author Unknown

It is often easier to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission.
Grace Hopper

The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is usually a poor judge of distance.
Author Unknown

It’s frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
Author Unknown

It’s always been and always will be the same in the world: The horse does the work and the coachman is tipped.
The Quotes Junction

If you wish to forget anything on the spot, make a note that this thing is to be remembered.
Edgar Allan Poe

People who snore always fall asleep first.
Author Unknown

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
Author Unknown

No one is listening until you fart.
Author Unknown

Keep a thing seven years and it’s bound to come in handy.
Russian Proverb

I find I always have to write something on a steamed mirror.
Elaine Dundy

A bargain is something you can’t use at a price you can’t resist.
Franklin P. Jones

An unwatched pot boils immediately.
H.F. Ellis

If you wonder where your child left his roller skates, try walking around the house in the dark.
Leopold Fechtner