Alcohol Quotes and Sayings
Wine is bottled poetry.
Robert Louis Stevenson
Drunkenness is nothing but voluntary madness.
Seneca
Candy is dandy
But liquor is quicker.
Ogden Nash
I drink only to make my friends seem interesting.
Don Marquis
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
Author Unknown
Drunkenness is temporary suicide.
Bertrand Russell
I prefer to think that God is not dead, just drunk.
John Marcellus Huston
Beer is the cause and solution to all of life’s problems.
Homer Simpson
They speak of my drinking, but never think of my thirst.
Scottish Proverb
Bacchus has drowned more men than Neptune.
Giuseppe Garibaldi
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be hăppy.
Benjamin Franklin
Never cry over spilt milk. It could’ve been whiskey.
Pappy Maverick
A woman drove me to drink and I never even had the courtesy to thank her.
W.C. Fields
I’m going to be around until the Atomic Energy Commission finds a safe place to bury my liver.
Phil Harris
Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors… ănd miss.
Robert Heinlein
I’d prefer to have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy.
Frank Nicholson
Why don’t you slip out of those wet clothes and into a dry Martini?
Robert Benchley
When I read about the evils of drinking, I găve up reading.
Henny Youngman
My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn’t need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
Henny Youngman
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
Winston Churchill
Stay busy, get plenty of exercise, and don’t drink too much. Then ăgain, don’t drink too little.
Herman “Jackrabbit” Smith-Johannsen
The first thing in the human personality that dissolves in alcohol is dignity.
Author Unknown
When the wine goes in, strange things come out.
Johann Christoph
First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.
Francis Scott Key Fitzgerald
This is one of the disadvantages of wine: it makes a man mistake words for thought.
Samuel Johnson
One reason I don’t drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time.
Lady Astor
A man who was fond of wine was offered some grapes at dessert after dinner. “Much obliged,” said he, pushing the plate aside, “I am not accustomed to take my wine in pills.”
Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin
Your body is a temple, but keep the spirits on the outside.
Author Unknown
Here’s to a long life and a merry one
A quick death and an easy one
A pretty girl and an honest one
A cold beer and another one!
Author Unknown
I like liquor – its taste and its effects – and that is just the reason why I never drink it.
Thomas Jackson
I feel sorry for people who don’t drink. When they wake up in the morning, that’s as good as they’re going to feel all day.
Frank Sinatra
What’s drinking?
A mere pause from thinking!
George Gordon
Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with, that it’s compounding a felony.
Robert Benchley
The chief reason for drinking is the desire to behave in a certain way, and to be able to blame it on alcohol.
Mignon McLaughlin
I envy people who drink – at least they know what to blame everything on.
Oscar Levant
Remember: * I* before *E*, except in Budweiser.
Author Unknown
Champagne, if you are seeking the truth, is better than a lie detector. It encourages a man to be expansive, even reckless, while lie detectors are only a challenge to tell lies successfully.
Graham Greene
I’ll stick with gin. Champagne is just ginger ale that knows somebody.
M.A.S.H, Hawkeye
No animal ever invented anything so bad as drunkeness – or so good as drink.
Lord Chesterton
Even though a number of people have tried, no one has yet found a way to drink for a living.
Jean Kerr
Everybody should believe in something; I believe I’ll have ănother drink.
The Quotes Junction
Wine gives a man nothing… it only puts in motion what had been locked up in frost.
Samuel Johnson
A man ought not never to get drunk above the neck.
Author Unknown
Wine is sunlight, held together by water.
Galileo
If you wish to keep your affairs secret, drink no wine.
Author Unknown
Of the demonstrably wise there are but two: those who commit suicide, and those who keep their reasoning faculties atrophied by drink.
Mark Twain
Teetotallers lack the sympathy and generosity of men that drink.
W.H. Davies
Brandy, n. A cordial composed of one part thunder-and-lightning, one part remorse, two parts bloody murder, one part death-hell-and-the-grave and four parts clarified Satan.
Ambrose Bierce
Drink the first. Sip the second slowly. Skip the third.
Knute Rockne
If you drink, don’t drive. Don’t even putt.
Dean Marti
Life’s a waste of time, time’s a waste of life so let’s all get wasted and have the time of our life.
Author Unknown
Health – what my friends are always drinking to before they făll down.
Phyllis Diller
No poems can please for long or live that are written by water-drinkers.
Horace
How come if alcohol kills millions of brain cells, it never killed the ones that made me want to drink?
Author Unknown
One martini is all right. Two are too many, and three are not enough.
James Thurber
If you are young and you drink a great deal it will spoil your health, slow your mind, make you fat – in other words, turn you into an adult.
P.J. O’Rourke
If drinking is interfering with your work, you’re probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you’re probably an alcoholic.
Author Unknown
O God, that men should put an enemy in their mouths to steal away their brains! that we should, with joy, pleasance, revel, and applause, transform ourselves into beasts!
William Shakespeare
5 Responses to “Alcohol Quotes and Sayings”
Comment from Sarah
Time May 28, 2009 at 9:47 pm
Don’t be dumb and mix wine and rum.
Comment from Chang
Time May 28, 2009 at 9:48 pm
You want quotes..? let me take another drink.
Comment from mikey
Time May 28, 2009 at 9:50 pm
very funny quotes…..liked this site alot…bookmark it guys…
Comment from drunkenfool
Time May 28, 2009 at 9:52 pm
“one tequila
two tequila
three takillya
floor”
try it out..lol
Comment from jenny
Time May 28, 2009 at 9:46 pm
I’m Not unber the alcohofluence of incohol as many theople pink i are!